Comments on: What I Learned From Chris Brogan

By: Scott Gould

Scott Gould — Sun, 11 Jul 2010 00:20:34 +0000

Hey KristiFirst of all, thanks for the comments – I so value your insights and input, so really appreciate you taking a moment to share them here 1. Virtual Participation – I'm stuck between the ideal and the reality on this. The ideal is that we can have hybrid engagement, and that those virtually attending can really get into participating with those physical present and vice versas. There is maturity, facilitation, a respect and attention paid to both physical and virtual participants. The reality is, however, that we currently aren't even achieving the kind of physical participation I want to see.My solution is readdressing how we actually run our events, in order to create more physical and virtual participation. I think currently, trying to attach participation to “keynote, panel” is not thinking through what we know about active engagement as being vital in learning.2. Thanks for the kind words on the post – I really did learn some valuable stuff from Chris, and I'm thrilled that we can discuss it here *and* get Chris' own comments on how we does it. I like what you say re “thinking of the next bits”. This is about, I believe, having a strong NO (http://scottgould.me/developing-a-strong-no/)3. Your two thoughts overlap. Is not our current need for digital participation drawn from our desire to be connected and always thinking about those who aren't in front of us? Do we need to begin rethinking our priorities?Scott

By: kriscolvin

kriscolvin — Sat, 10 Jul 2010 19:36:55 +0000

Scott, it's interesting why you say you don't show the virtual audience anymore. We recently did an event for Meers Advertising http://www.twitterface.com/meersadv and Sam Meers said afterward he loved having the tweets and chat (which was under the video when page was live) as it gave an added dimension to what was happening in the room and made the experience seem "richer." I found his observation interesting, as yours is here. His was a panel discussion with a smaller audience both online and in the room, so not a major conference that would draw some of the backbiting commentary we've seen before... I would guess the quality of conversations and maturity of the virtual audience would make a big difference.This is a GREAT post by the way. I am waaaaaaaay too guilty of "playing on my phone" (with those people, when other people are there in person) and also of "thinking of the next bits" as Chris talks about, while doing almost anything. It's hard with so much weighing on your mind to get to it as you get to it and be fully present in the moment of activity I'm in, for me. I need to work on this.

By: Scott Gould

Scott Gould — Sat, 10 Jul 2010 03:44:32 +0000

Thanks Malcolm

By: Malcolm Sleath

Malcolm Sleath — Sat, 10 Jul 2010 00:14:32 +0000

Even after this short time, I know that it's always a pleasure to talk with you Scott.

By: Scott Gould

Scott Gould — Fri, 09 Jul 2010 20:49:31 +0000

Malcolm – thank you so much for this deep, engaging comment.I do pretty much the same if I'm in a seated event – I draw where people are and play the game with myself as to getting their names right.I think I'll use this comment to form a blog post for this month! This is gold Malcolm, thank you so much!Scott

By: Malcolm Sleath

Malcolm Sleath — Fri, 09 Jul 2010 16:24:23 +0000

This has reminded me of what is easy to do, but I don't do nearly enough. I've also valued Chris Brogan's how-tos. This underlined for me that intent and goodwill is not enough; it comes down to cultivating a behavioural habit. Then it becomes part of you.As I get older, my hearing is not what I would like it to be especially in noisy rooms with lots of hard surfaces. I find it takes a certain amount of guts when being introduced to younger people to get them to repeat their names or something they have just said, and now, although I am by no means 'hard of hearing', I have learned to be upfront about it and tell them why I have asked them to repeat themselves. At first I hated doing this.There is something else I would like to share, which relates to entering meetings or workshops where there is a group of ten or a dozen people. When I do this, people often comment on my ability to relate to people in the room. But I know it is not an innate ability. If I do this, it works. If I just rely on my memory, it doesn't. It is as simple as that.The technique is a variation of what Chris has described. I take a sheet of paper and draw a simple map of where everyone is sitting. As they introduce themselves, I pay attention and write their name in the right place on the plan, and then one or two words of what they have said. Like Chris, I look at the people when they are talking, and just focus on the content instead of making judgements about it.Once I have my map, during the early part of the meeting, I let my eyes go round the room, saying the names of the people in my head as I look at them. In the first half an hour, I make sure I do this a few times. Then, I play a little game and look at people at random, to see if I can say their name in my head.Now, you might think I am not paying attention to the meeting. Well, I'm not focusing on what I had for breakfast, or that letter that came in the post, or the awful time I had in the tube getting here – which is probably what half the people in the room _are_ doing. Neither am I focusing on what I want to say.The result is that when I do speak, I can remember who has said what and relate my contribution to theirs so they feel included. I come across as a much better person than I really am (I'm just as self-obsessed as the next person.) It really is a question of habit and discipline. If you keep doing it, it becomes a natural part of who you are, but if you don't do it, the vagaries of short-term memory come into play and you go right back to square one. It's about doing it every day.

By: Scott Gould

Scott Gould — Fri, 09 Jul 2010 15:34:11 +0000

SyThis is very good. Thank you!!!Scott

By: Scott Gould

Scott Gould — Fri, 09 Jul 2010 13:54:22 +0000

“you matter more than me, at least for the whole time I'm in your presence”Chris, it pains me to say that most ministers who tell us to practice “love your neighbour” don't nearly do this as well as you do.

By: Scott Gould

Scott Gould — Fri, 09 Jul 2010 13:46:32 +0000

Thanks Chris for this – much appreciated And thank you for sharing some of these things with me back in February. Like I said above, it's really, really helped me in so many ways.Scott

By: sytaylor

sytaylor — Fri, 09 Jul 2010 13:46:20 +0000

I'd say this is a fair comment. I used to study Social Dynamics for some time, and even ran a community teaching geeks how to be more social. There are some amazing things you can do to help remember someones name.One of the best techniques I ever found for remembering something is close deletions. So to remember that term I'd write “To remember things I use [...] deletions”Then set that as a reminder for 3 days time. Just as you're about to forget, something like that hitting your subconscious buries it in. Our brains are 'use it or lose it' lumps of elastic learning capability.I endeavour to be better at building value relationships with people. I grew up an only child with video games consoles for friends. It took some doing to learn how to be more giving… but the person who gives receives the most. So long as you are wise enough to only give to those who will appreciate it. (The easiest way to find out if they will? Try giving and see what their reaction is)